Smile Like You Mean It

So recently, I've been extraordinarily happy. There is just this situation, I guess you could call it, that has taken a turn for the best recently. Or what seems to be the best. I am smiling and happy. I am anticipating new 'developments' in the 'situation.' Feelings can be a crazy thing. I don't want people to think that it is just 'rebound' feelings that I'm experiencing. Because its not. The interest has been there honestly for a year, just never any hope for potential because I was already involved in something else as was the other side of it. But then things opened up. And it seems like no hope for potential has turned into 'God, I hope something great comes out of this, because I sure as hell feel it.' But, even if nothing comes out of this, I won't beat myself up over it. I am trying this new thing and its called 'not getting my hopes up.' As hard as it is.

I'm going to keep my head up. And ride this wave of happiness for as long as I can. Everything seems to be going in my favor so far, let's keep that up. Even if I don't get what I want, it could still be worse, right? In the meantime, I'll keep smiling with my lop-sided dimples. :)

High on Life

Despite the fact that my schedule for tomorrow is going to rape me hard, I am so high on life its unbelievable. I only have 10 days until I can spend a few days at home for Thanksgiving. I am thoroughly pumped for this. Although, I know they will annoy me tons, I miss them so much. I have already made plans to lay around, be lazy, and watch some ridiculous movies with my crazy little sister. I am really busy the next few days/next whole week and I am hoping that it makes the Thanksgiving break approach faster.

Let's Take a Stab at This..

So this blog stuff. It is something I had contemplated starting for a while now. But I am finally getting off my ass to do so. I may rant, rave, and holler but bear with me. I might possibly be worth your time.

I just want to say, I am super excited and anticipating this Christmas season. I know its almost only Halloween. But Christmas is such a wonderful time of year. I can't wait to sit around at night and watch Christmas movies with my friends here at college. But what I can't wait for the most, is going home for Winter Break and spending time with my mommy. She loves Christmas as well. Although, since her mother died years ago, it just has never been the same. So my goal the past few years has been to make it the best for my mom. The sad thing is, at my house, once the presents are open, not even 15 minutes after that, the typical chaos breaks out. Mom becomes flustered and the insults start flying. Towards everyone. And yet, I still cannot wait.

So real quick. This semester. Has been a mind fuck and a half. I have been feeling new emotions towards friends (and I don't mean good ones). When someone cannot be themselves and they need to take things from other people's personalities just because they want to fit in a little bit more, its a bit overwhelming. Okay, you were obnoxious from the start but now you're forcing yourself on us. I may gag. And the work load. It's much more than before and stressing me out. The stress is just a huge negative factor that makes me even more flustered and agitated. I don't like to be angry. I'm pretty chill but my temper is flaring and it scares me.

Well I'm listening to Barry Manilow. Its soothing. I'll think of something else to vent about soon. Until then, Happy Ramblings. :)